MYRNA’S BIG SUMMER ADVENTURE

Hello one and all, it’s Myrna Lovejoy, back again with her ‘tidbits’ of what’s going on in and about our little Hamlet. And to say, my oh my, what going’s on there have been!!
I’m sure all of you turned out in your best Patriotic outfit of “Red, White and Blue” to help celebrate our Nation’s birthday this Fourth of July! It was truly a sight to behold. The streets queued up with a dazzling flurry of American Flags (that were made IN the U.S.A. by the way…I looked).
Hermione and I decided to make a splash and help celebrate the Fourth in style by joining the throng of thousands at the beautiful new water park!! What a splash it was, too! How marvelous is this wonderful symbol of what is great about our little megalopolis and this fantastic facility! Good job I say, Huzzah!
Hermione and I knew that one day, our hours and hours of dedicated practice on the Brown University synchronized swim ballet team, would pay off! Those countless times when our girlfriends would be off to some fabulous soireé ,with the boys from the Greek house, we would find ourselves breast-stroking our way in the pool. We always however thought it curious, that Dean Mary A. Dyke, would always want and stay to watch us! Hmm? Anyway, there we were in our brand new, shocking Lime green Lycra, one piece official Esther Williams swimsuit, with matching Lime green flowered swim cap, swimming away! I must admit that Hermione and I took to the water like a couple of mermaid sirens! Our upside, down, pirouettes were simply a sight to behold!! Turn, kick, kick, kick, turn! Flawlessly, we would shoot through water!
When I told Gunther that Hermione and I were working up our old routine for the Fourth extravaganza, he was very surprised! He mumbled something about oxygen and paramedics being on hand, but I ignored him. Up to the attic I went in search of my old friend, my Lime green, one piece Lycra, official Esther Williams swimsuit and matching cap. There it was, just I had retired it those many eons ago, just waiting for me to return. Funny, I didn’t remember it being that tiny? Oh well, that’s the marvelous thing about Lycra it will stretch and stretch and stretch.
After weeks and weeks and weeks of practice, in Hermione’s pool, the old “team” was back! Glorious it was! The best part however, was, our ritual of daily Margaritas as a cool down. It’s amazing how smoothly three pitchers of Margarita’s go down, after a strenuous work out! We were ready! We anxiously awaited the day of the water park opening. My only regret was that my mother, you remember her, Bunny DeForde, wouldn’t be there to see us. No, she isn’t dead, she was off to Cabo until October with her Latino “counselor”; Jorge. My therapist says this has always been and will continue to be a constant in my life, and I need to learn to let go.
The day arrived! Gunther dutifully agreed to chauffeur us. We dutifully packed the Edsel station wagon with all the provisions for not only our Grand Performance, but also a deliciously sumptuous “tailgate” buffet that we would indulge in, following our swim! My, what a buzz there was about town, big name entertainment, food, beverage, fireworks! And of course, there Hermione and I were decked out in our matching Esther Williams Lycra swimming regalia with matching caps! We looked stunning! Imagine our surprise however, when we made our way to the pool and discovered that it was a bunch of water slides. Huge waterslides! Small waterslides! Would that dissuade us? No! Hermione and I were determined. We had worked too hard and looked much too fabulous to let this minor set back prevent us from enjoying ourselves. All I remember as we climbed to the top of the ladder is the whiny wailing of the kid behind us, when Hermione and I took his water-tube from him, and like school girls run amok; splashed our way down the exhilarating slide! Green Lycra never looked so good! Esther Williams, eat your heart out!